Beloved son of Sonia Rayman (Peter Sharland) and David Stormes (Sharon Avey). He will be dearly missed by his brother Nigel (Linda Bui), stepbrother Justin Sharland (Karlee) and stepsister Katie Marks. He leaves behind Aunts and Uncles, Sue Stormes, Peter Stormes (Rachel) cousins Zoë and Nathan, Linda Dirienzo (Mike), Wendy Howe (Tony) & Gavin Rayman (Wendi) & cousins Danielle, Andrea, Flavio, Ciera, Paula, Matthew, Aaron, Justine, Tyler & Brittany. He will be dearly missed by his grandparents Bob and Nancy Stormes. Predeceased by his grandparents Rose and Ray Rayman.
Julian succumbed to his suicidal injuries Sept. 10 –after 6 days in St. Michael’s ICU - a tragic loss that defies logic. We need to tell his story to help others which was central to how Julian lived. In letters he wrote he said he couldn’t understand his thoughts and actions and so none of us could know what he was going through or understand all that brought him to his decision.
The official record will say suicide, but Julian asked us to consider it euthanasia. He hid his inner torment from family and friends. It would be easy to say his problem was substance abuse, but that was effect, not cause. Substances were used to numb the pain and give him relief, but that relief came with regret and shame. He carried on a normal fully employed, socially engaged life with no big red flags. Mental health was the root of his problems and he realized that but could never ask for help. As his last act, he posted on Facebook asking people to donate to the Canadian Mental Health Association. Please consider helping this way so others may avoid his fate and other families won’t endure such pain and loss.
Julian was devoted to his friends and helping others and that’s what we will remember most about him. He raised funds for and provided supplies to homeless people. He would stay out all night to find friends in trouble on the streets of Toronto and get them to safety and treatment. People are here today because of his efforts and we’re so proud of his selflessness. He took people in who had no place to go. He was dependable and went to extraordinary lengths to help friends. We learned more about his efforts as he laid on life support with no chance of recovery. When you see a homeless or in distress person, imagine back beyond their current circumstances – no one wants to be a homeless drug addict. While the stories are different, they are a series of tragedies, bad decisions, shame and pain numbing that often started with untreated mental health issues and turned into a downhill spiral.
Julian loved sports – especially basketball and the Raptors and could recite endless statistics. He enjoyed many games in person in Toronto and was there for the World Championship parade. He also loved comedies and could rhyme off lines from the Simpsons, Seinfeld and Family Guy among others. The laughter helped ease the pain and entertain his friends.
Julian had long ago elected to be an organ donor and recipients were found for some of his organs and others will go to research, so he’s helping more people on his way to peace. Please consider electing to be a donor - it will bring your family a small silver lining and great sense of pride in a very devastating time. https://www.giftoflife.on.ca/en/
If you are experiencing some mental health issues, please reach out to someone or an agency for support. If you suspect someone may be having issues, offer them some assistance or direction to professional help.
If you knew Julian, remember his kindness. If you didn’t know him, but any part of this resonated with you, please extend some kindness to others in one of his ways or in some way meaningful to you.
Many thanks to the staff of St. Michaels Trauma Neuro ICU and the Trillium Gift of Life for their care and kindness.
Per Julian’s wishes, please direct donations to https://cmha.ca/
At his request, there will be no funeral.