Peacefully, Irma slipped the bonds of her earthly life on the morning of March 15th. At 88 and following many years of increasingly challenging health issues, our proud, loyal, forthright and above all loving and beloved Mom/Nagyi was only too ready to reunite with her dear Tibor. They celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary mere months before his passing in 2007 and the subsequent years of living without the man she felt she belonged to, and he to her, meant persevering along a path that for Irma had lost much of its lustre.

Despite that burden of loss and her health challenges, Irma’s depth of devotion to her only son Les, his wife Audrey (a daughter to her, never a daughter-in-law) and her adored and adoring grandchildren, James (Maggie), Lexi (Andrew) and Christopher was unfaltering.

Irma will be deeply missed and fondly remembered by her brother-in-law Miklos and sister-in-law Suzanne Marton, her extended family in the US and Hungary, as well as the Stevens-Fleischmann family in St. Catharines Ontario. She appreciated the dear friends that held her hand at a distance when the challenges of current times kept them apart.

She wore her heart on her sleeve and was uniquely generous – bestowing thoughtful gifts that could be seen and touched, many more that could be tasted, and above all others the treasures that could only be felt or experienced… her tender embraces, wise counsel, quick wit and whimsical expressions of delight when spending time together. She was immensely proud of her grandchildren, unabashedly championing their every achievement. If grandparenting was an Olympic event, Nagyi was the Gold Medalist.

Irma was the only child of Imre and Anna Varga, born and raised in Kecskemét, Hungary. Her care during her formative years fell primarily to her father and stepmother. They loved her, and she them, but the impact of the early separation from her own mother reverberated throughout her life. So began the almost insatiable love affair of Irma with any and every baby or toddler. Some of us are dog or cat lovers; Irma was enamoured with babies, an endearing quality that stayed with her to the end. Perhaps she saw her own eyes in the faces of the very young. One thing’s for sure, she treasured them all and was forever grateful for having had three grand babies of her very own to smother with affection.

She and Tibor began their lives together in the mid-1950s during a time of great upheaval in Hungary with the invasion of Russia. This left an indelible impression on both of them, and Irma was often consumed and tormented by the memories of those difficult years. Following a whirlwind courtship, they together fled the turmoil of the Hungarian revolution, crossing by foot into Austria in 1956. The following year they wed and, thanks to the Canadian emigration line being shorter than the one for Australia, were soon bound for the east coast of Canada.

Like many other immigrants at that time, their path following their arrival in New Brunswick, led them across the country. Irma and Tibor were captivated by the majesty of BC, settling just long enough in Prince Rupert to further their English language skills and welcome their son Les in ‘58. It was their move to Toronto shortly thereafter, however, that allowed the family to put down roots and set the wheels in motion for the many happy, productive and fulfilling years that would follow.

Irma enjoyed an accomplished career at RBC (forever The Royal Bank of Canada to her), balancing her work life with raising Les and enjoying, along with Tibor, quality time with friends, extensive travel, outings to the opera, symphony and theatre. She kept up with current events, had an opinion on everything (though professed otherwise), was an avid reader, a movie buff and knew by heart every episode of Murder She Wrote. The jury is still out on whether Angela Lansbury was her most influential role model.

Irma was colourful and stylish, keeping up with the latest trends in fashion and decor. She believed how you dressed and what you wore mattered. One of Irma’s most joyous discoveries (and ours too) was how radiant she looked and clearly felt in her favourite Linda Lundstrom outfits. Even as she neared the end of her life she couldn’t bear to part with the designer’s stunning pieces. They were such a tangible reminder of the parties, theatre outings and fulfilling social life that had filled her calendar in years gone by. The staff at the assisted living home where Irma lived commented often on how she took such care with her appearance, never venturing to the dining room without her lipstick painstakingly applied, her purse over the handle of her walker and a hint of Yves Saint Laurent wafting behind.

Mom loved to entertain and was a masterful chef and baker. Over the recent years of increasing physical challenge, one of Nagyi’s greatest concerns was that she could no longer bake. She had loved every moment devoted to the planning, creation and presentation of her exquisite cakes. It meant the world to her to contribute something to special occasions for which she took so much personal pride. Her cake baking was a part of her identity; she revelled in it and her family and friends were the lucky beneficiaries.

Above all else though, if you’ll indulge the repetition, Nagyi delighted in her family, particularly her relationships with each of her grandchildren. Babysitting was her favourite pastime. When she wasn’t with her firstborn grandson Jamie, her beautiful Alexandra, or her forever young Chris, she spent hours pouring over the photo albums and scrapbooks she lovingly created. They quite literally gave her life depth, colour and texture. Thankfully the grandchildren (and their friends) also had good appetites. She was never happier than in her kitchen, putting the final touches on a gourmet Hungarian meal with her dear family or friends (preferably both) gathered around the dining room table. Those meals were legendary, as were the leftovers…a memory to truly savour.

Irma would be the first to say the happy years flew by too quickly. After Tibor passed, she no longer found the same joy in simple pleasures. As her health declined it became harder for her to look forward to a future with the same optimism and fortitude, qualities that had served her well throughout her earlier life. While it has been hard to say goodbye, Irma’s passing has united those closest to her and brought us joy, understandably tempered by the sadness of the finality of the closing of this chapter. We know she has finally achieved the peace she so fervently desired. We give thanks for that and for her precious, complicated and treasured life. We love her so.

The family wishes to express their sincere and heartfelt gratitude to Sarah and her entire team at Sunrise of Aurora where Irma spent her final years. The genuine warmth and steadfast compassion shown by the caregivers, nurses and Dr. Norm provided her with a safe, comforting and comfortable final home.

As per her wishes, Irma will be interred with Tibor at York Cemetery following a private family sendoff. In her memory and in lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Parkinson Canada donate.parkinson.ca