In memory of

Dasen "林达森" Lin

November 6, 1939 -  November 30, 2019

我们沉痛地宣告,我们尊敬的丈夫,父亲及外公林达森先生因病于北京时间2019年12月1日凌晨3点18分在大多伦多宾顿市民医院安详去世。终年80岁。临终时,夫人,女儿及女婿,外孙女及外孙女婿陪伴身旁。

林达森先生,一生坎坷,工作认真,爱抚家庭。在工作中严格要求。被同事尊称为"鬼子"。为中国的航空事业做出了贡献。对家庭,对下一辈慈爱有加。全力支持儿女的事业。对同事,宽宏大量,从不计较。

我们慈祥的丈夫,父亲及外公:我们热爱您,想念您!您安息吧!您永远活在我们的心中!

Guestbook 

(5 of 11)


Lin Lin (Daughter)

Entered December 3, 2019 from Brampton

My dear dad, I love you!

Betty (Grand daughter)

Entered December 3, 2019

On November 30, 2:18pm 2019 Toronto time, I watched as my grandfather lay in the Brampton Civic Hospital ICU for the 4th day. The monitor showing his heart beats went from 30 to 20, then to 0. I still can't believe it now. These days, I feel as if I am living on as if everything hasn't happened and then suddenly, it's like I get these reminders that he is gone. I can still hear his voice saying my name "张雨橙!" in that loud and clear voice. Encouraging me to learn pingpong, swimming, and so many things in my life. His hard working spirit resides in me and the way I live my life now. He never pushed me or forced me to become anything extraordinary. But he always made me feel like it was ok just being me, being different from others, being comfortable with being ordinary, because I was always most special to him. He spoiled me to be the self-respecting and self-knowledgeable person that I believe I am.

My fondest memory was that he used to make 牛肉粉, my favourite food till now. After he came to Canada, he would ask me if I am coming home on the weekend so he could prepare. I never came home enough. Till the days when I realized he wasn't able to make it for me anymore. He also would often make silly faces at me and took everything lightheartedly, you could never tell when he was ever is pain. He used to repeat the only sentence he could say in English to me, "Hello? How are you? I'm fine, thank you." Which is one of the first things I learned during English school. At that time, he picked me up and dropped me off taking the bus every time. I'd fall asleep in his arms, even standing. Now I think back, maybe saying that sentence was the only way he could connect with me after I moved to Canada. He recorded me talking and telling stories on this little mini tape recorder and after I left, he listened to that over and over. I wish I could've appreciated how much he missed me.

After we separated for more than 10 years. In 2018, he was at my wedding, but he also got sick. Like really really sick. He had double bypass heart surgery, and as much as we all wanted him to get better, he didn't. At first, he just looked like he got really tired, then he stopped coming downstairs, then he stopped leaving the house completely. Later, he stopped smiling, stopped making faces, and stopped responding, until eventually on November 27, I received a text from my dad at about 4:30pm that he had been brought to the hospital by ambulance. I rushed there but it was too late for him to ever wake up and say one more thing again. Now I scream and cry for him to come back, cause I miss him so much. But nothing can bring back time.

I feel like a part of me is gone. At this time, he would proudly say, "阿公是最喜欢橙橙的,对不对?". I find myself avoiding the silent empty times in my mind when I can stop to think because I am a little scared of coming to terms with the fact that he is never coming back. On that day, the doctor told me sentence by sentence that his conditions had worsened and that he was leaving us. I translated, sentence by sentence to my grandma, who stayed by his bedside for nights and days waiting for him to even make a flinch. Eventually, I was asked to tell her to make a choice, to accept letting him go. Even now, I keep thinking he is just sitting at home, watching his Chinese soap opera, waiting for me to come upstairs and peer into his door.

To anyone who didn't know him like I did, I want you to remember that my grandfather was someone who stood by his own beliefs and opinions. He taught me how to walk and run, but most importantly, he taught me how to be myself.

Grandpa, I miss you so so much. But now I know I have the strengths of your spirit to continue living my life and make something of it. I know I have to take care of the family and make up for lost time with my family, especially grandma. I hope you rest in peace.

译文:
多伦多时间2019年11月30日下午2:18,我看着外公躺在宾顿市民医院ICU的第4天。他的心跳监视器上的数字从30变为20,然后变为0。我现在仍然不敢相信。这些天,我觉得仿佛一切都没有发生过,然后突然之间,我被惊醒,他已经走了。我仍然可以听到他的声音叫我的名字“张雨橙!”响亮而清晰的声音。鼓励我学习乒乓球,游泳和一生中的很多事情。他的努力工作精神留存于我和我现在的生活方式。他从不硬推我或强迫我成为非凡的人。但是他总是让我觉得做我自己,与别人不同,做一个普通人感到舒服就行。因为我一直对于他最特别。他宠爱我,使我成为一个自尊,自信的人。

我最美好的回忆是,他以前曾经为我做过牛肉粉,这是我迄今为止最喜欢的食物。他来加拿大后,他会问我周末是否要回家,以便他做好准备。我回家次数真是太少了。直到有一天,我意识到他再也无法为我做了。他还会经常对我做鬼脸,轻描淡写地对待一切,你永远无法知道他什么时候痛苦。他过去常常对我说英语,他只能说一句话:“你好?你好吗?我很好,谢谢。”这是我在英语学校学习的第一件事。那时,他坐公交车接送我。我会睡在他的怀里,甚至他站着时。现在我回想起来,也许说那句话是我来到加拿大后他与我联系的唯一方式。他在一台小型磁带录音机上记录了我说话和讲故事,我离开后,他一遍又一遍地听。我希望我能感谢他这么想我。

我们分开十多年之后。 2018年,他参加了我的婚礼,但他也生病了。好像真的很严重。他做了两根心血管搭桥手术,尽管我们都希望他变得更好,但他没有。起初,他看起来好像真的很累,然后停止下楼,然后完全停止离开房子。后来,他停止了微笑,停止了做鬼脸,并且停止了回应,直到最终在11月27日,我从父亲那里收到了一封短信,说他被救护车送到医院了。我赶到那里,但为时已晚,他再也无法再说话。现在,我为叫他回来而大喊大哭,因为我非常想念他。但是,没有什么可以让时间倒转。

我感觉自己的一部分消失了。在这个时候,他应该会自豪地说:“阿公是最喜欢橙橙的,对不对?”。当我停下来思考时,我发现自己在尽力回避寂静空虚时刻,因为我有点害怕接受他再也不会回来的事实。那天,医生逐句告诉我他的病情恶化了,他要离开我们了。我逐句翻译给我的外婆,外婆在他的床头上守候了几天几夜,等着他有动静。最终,我被要求告诉她,接受他已离世的事实。即使是现在,我仍然认为他只是坐在家里,看着他的中国电视剧,等着我上楼,看着房门内的他。

对于任何一个不像我这样了解他的人,我想让您记住我的外祖父是一个坚持自己的信念和观点的人。他教我如何走路和跑步,但最重要的是,他教我如何做我自己。

外公我好想您,但是现在我知道我有您的精神力量,可以继续生活并有所作为。我知道我必须照顾好家人,并弥补与家人(尤其是外婆)失去的时间。请您安息。

张金良 金林女 (亲家)

Entered December 4, 2019 from 上海

12月1日凌晨三点十八分,我们的亲家公林达森先生在多伦多的医院中与世长辞。惊闻此噩耗时,我们万分悲痛,虽说林先生患有心肺功能疾病,但身体状况还是不错的,二天前我们刚有过视频对话,怎么突然就驾鶴西去匆忙地走了呢!
林先生酷爱航空事业,说到飞机制造工业,尤其是发动机制造技术真是如数家珍,充满着激情和自豪,他把毕生的精力无私地奉献给了祖国的航空事业,得到了应有的尊重。
林先生对家庭对孩子们慈祥关爱,教导有方,使儿孙们不但都能有一技之长,还使他们的小家庭都美满幸福,林先生在家谈天说地样样精通,说国家大事,谈体育竞技,论风土人情,使全家人都受益匪浅,谈笑中洋溢着处世为人的深情寓意。林先生在单位里是受人尊敬的高级技术人才,在家里也是下得了厨房的一把手,让家人也享受了他一辈子的美味佳肴,每逢夏天我们见面时,他自制的冻粉更是滑爽清凉,博得三代人的共同赞赏。可惜这一切随着他的离去,我们再也享受不了了。
由于我们也已步入高龄,又远在上海,不能前往送别老亲家深感遗憾。
请林先生放心,你对儿孙们的谆谆教诲,会让他们时刻铭记,他们定会孝敬好蔡老师,也会做好各自的事业,会继续保持融融乐乐的家庭生活。林先生,你安心地走吧,愿你一路走好,天堂没有病痛,在天之灵保佑全家健康平安!
张金良金林女

林琳 (女儿)

Entered December 4, 2019 from Canada


北京时间 12月1日,3:18分,我亲爱的父亲大人带着安详的笑容在加拿大病逝,享年80岁。
震雷声声,天摇地动! 紧紧拉住父亲的手,声声呼唤,爸! 你要坚强,不能撒手啊!生离死别就在眼前,我的世界突然缺了一个角,人间少了一位慈祥的父亲,从此我不再是那个被父亲捧在手上的掌上明珠,什么痛彻心扉,回天乏术,这些过去离自己非常遥远的形容词,如今都刻骨铭心的嵌在了我的心坎里,也许天堂没有病痛,你急不可待的要奔向那个方向,女儿祝你一路走好,在那边依然快乐无比。

2017年7 月,经过了三年的等待,我们终于可以把二老接到身边陪伴左右,满心欢喜,家乐融融。可是事与愿违,来到异国他乡的老人,就像是切了根的老松树,空气和水都不是他们习惯的样子,过去的辉煌不再有人知道,小辈们想像的乐趣就如兔子喂鱼儿吃胡萝卜,没有了答案,别人是落叶归根,您却是背井离乡,走进一个陌生的国度,语言不通,习俗不同,那片熟悉的土地如今已成为您永远的遗憾!

落地不到半年 ,2018年2月 查出冠心病,全家人跌入黑谷,心脏手术,肺部手术,康复治疗,验血 ,复检,一个又一个医生约见,女婿,孙女轮番 上阵,日程表上 写满去医院的旅程,女儿发疯一样在网上搜索一切与心脏疾病有关的信息,那些平时从来没有见过 的英文单词一个一个的去翻译它的含义,感谢老公和女儿在这段绝望日子里给予我的陪伴和支持。

没有想到,我的人生第一次走进殡仪馆是为了悲送我的父亲大人! 老父亲一生待人和睦,事业有成,曾是中国航空事业的开拓者之一,在黎阳公司威望很高! 不论是同辈还是小辈,人人都喜欢参加由父亲带队完成的项目,印象里的父亲,年轻时活泼开朗,积极向上,工作认真,业余生活十分丰富,曾经是所里乒乓球队的教练,排球队的领队,一心培养我打乒乓球,三块砖头就能拼出一个乒乓球台,家里养鸡,养兔子,种自留地,一辈子忙碌着并快乐着! 出差一趟能背回来十几个大旅行袋,里面全是我喜欢的小人书和零食,用半个月工资为我买一束塑料花毫不手软,每次下厂一趟我都有红枫湖大虾吃,贵州的条件虽然艰苦,我却像一个衣食无忧的公主,即使是我大学毕业,老爸的光环也依然罩在我的头上,工作生活畅通无阻,无论我走到哪里办事,只要是介绍我是鬼子女儿,没有办不成的公事。90年代时髦下海,我毫不犹豫的跳进了商海,从深圳到上海,再到加拿大,背后总有您坚强的后盾,如今,离开了那片熟悉的土地,即使儿孙绕膝,依然感觉两眼一抹黑,语言不通,行动不便,心情失落无力,孤独寂寞,身体每况愈下,女儿看在眼里,痛在心里,那些美好的远景,计划都不能令你快乐起来,常常自责,古话说,父母在,不远游,因为父母老了,跟不上儿女们快步奔跑的脚步。
千呼万唤,叫不回我亲爱的老父亲! 唯祝愿您在另一个世界获得重生,爸! 今后我会加倍的呵护老妈,您放心地去吧!

父亲大人永垂不朽!

您视为珍宝的女儿林琳,女婿张建忠敬上!

Jenny Huang (colleague, friend)

Entered December 5, 2019 from Mississauga

节哀顺便, 我们现在应该对去世者真诚祝愿,祝他老人家一路走好,天堂没有病痛,
在九泉之下安息吧!

Photos 

(5 of 49)