This was our Dad

At 152cm and 120lb, he was our gentle giant, the guiding light and the pillar of our lives.
He loved his family, his mom and dad, his brothers and sister. He was a loving and indulging Dad. He loved Mom and he loved us. He kept all the worries to himself and gave us all that he could afford. We had no clue that he had worried about rent money and tuition for us until they came out in his nightmares in the last few years of his life. Sometimes, in his confused state, he would ask about his parents who had passed on more than 50 years ago.

He took risks.
He was brave enough to send his wife and 5 young kids on a small boat to find freedom while he stayed behind to be with his ailing mother. He was so sad when he came to the prison to visit us after our escape plan failed. He was unflinched when Mom pressed a piece of gold nugget that the police had missed into his hand under the watchful eyes of the prison guards. The next month he came to visit us in prison, there were more sugarcane sugar blocks for us!
At 53 he uprooted the entire family to start a new life in Canada with $35USD in his pocket. He had faith in the new country and in his sister and brother-in-law who sponsored us. We're forever grateful for their generosity and for the new country to give us a new start in life.

He was a peacekeeper. He never had a harsh word towards anyone. He was always gentle and looked at the world in a positive light. He often reminded us that knowing what is wrong or unjust is good enough, there’s no need for confrontation. Move on!

He loved his friends. He was curious and always eager to please. He loved to share what he enjoyed with those around him. Especially food. Especially ice-cream, French cuisine, fruits, and cakes!
There were 2 pictures taken on David’s birthday. In both, everyone's eyes were looking at the camera, Dad’s were on the cake. It was an ice-cream cake!
Mom used to say that the only thing he knew how to make in the kitchen was to boil water. Well, he took cooking classes in retirement and happily demonstrated his skills. We quietly enjoyed the meal while eyeing the huge pile of pots and pans that needed to be cleaned afterward.

He loved the arts. He loved music.
Before dementia set in, he’d always have a tune in his head. He would hum or whistle wherever he went. Two days before his passing, he sang along, in tune, to the lullaby that his mom used to sing to him, and he taught it to us to sing to his grandkids.

He loved to dance.
He joined the Part I Line Dance classes when he retired from the Chinese Community Centre at age 71 and kept at it for the next 13 years until a stroke took away his mobility. He tried to move his legs to the box steps while in rehab, of course, at a much slower pace.

He loved the arts of photography, calligraphy, and painting
He took Chinese brush painting classes after he retired and filled our walls with his paintings. When he couldn’t write with his right hand anymore, he practised Chinese calligraphy with his left hand.

He loved literature and poetry.
At 95, he still could recite the classical Chinese epic poems that he learned by heart when he was 15. Each of those poems had more than 80 lines long!

He loved languages
He was fluent in Vietnamese, Chinese (Cantonese and Mandarin), some English and French
He took all the continuing education French courses offered at Seneca College for many years during retirement even when the French teachers couldn’t understand his French that was laden with heavy Chinese accents.

He was a Math Whiz!
Going shopping with him was a breeze. He’d tell us what the taxes were and if we had enough money to pay before getting to the cash register. That was before the pocket calculators and cellphones.
He filed income taxes for seniors and new immigrants when he worked at the Chinese Community Centre. After his retirement, many of those clients would trek all the way from ChinaTown to north Scarborough so that they could get him to do their taxes. At the beginning, he filed more than 70 tax returns per year for free. They also brought him some grapes, apples, and oranges for his trouble.

He loved life.
He loved nature and all the beautiful things that life had to offer. He loved to travel the world and see the beauty in people and places. He often reminded us that there’s a lot of beauty in the world. You just have to open your eyes and look.

He wanted to enjoy life for as long as possible. Half a year ago, we asked him what we should do if he couldn't swallow anymore; he replied matter of factly, ‘Just put a feeding tube in and I’ll go on!’ We would like to thank all the nurses and doctors at the Scarborough Health Network Birchmount Hospital, Medicine 4A unit, for making his last days comfortable and pain-free.

We hope that he is now resting comfortably in Mom and Vincent’s embrace.

Mom had waited 30 long years for him to finally reunite with her. Once moving to Canada and financially independent, they loved travelling together to explore different places that they read about in books and magazines. Now, they’re travelling and seeing the universe together. Bon voyage!

To the family and friends who took him on their travels in Mom’s absence and enriched his life. Thank you!

To us, he is Love. He is the beauty in our world.
If we could achieve 10% of his being, we’d be proud!

We’ll always love you, 爸爸. Au Revoir!

In lieu of flowers, please donate to the Heart and Stroke Foundation or to the Scarborough Health Network.